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Apple Voiding Smokers' Warranties? 1078

Posted by Soulskill
from the a-what-a-day-keeps-the-doctor-away dept.
Mr2001 writes "Consumerist reports that Apple is refusing to work on computers that have been used in smoking households. 'The Apple store called and informed me that due to the computer having been used in a house where there was smoking, [the warranty has been voided] and they refuse to work on the machine "due to health risks of second hand smoke,"' wrote one customer. Another said, 'When I asked for an explanation, she said [the owner of the iMac is] a smoker and it's contaminated with cigarette smoke, which they consider a bio-hazard! I checked my Applecare warranty and it says nothing about not honoring warranties if the owner is a smoker.' Apple claims that honoring the warranty would be an OSHA violation. (Remember when they claimed enabling 802.11n for free would be a Sarbanes-Oxley violation?)"
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Apple Voiding Smokers' Warranties?

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  • Wash it (Score:5, Funny)

    by EgNagRah (1650283) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:22AM (#30184412)
    Does putting it in the dishwasher void the warranty?
  • I'm a PC... (Score:5, Funny)

    by jesseck (942036) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:24AM (#30184428)
    and I get to smoke in my own house, while browsing the Internet (for porn)
  • by flyneye (84093) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:31AM (#30184518) Homepage

    Well if your Iphone was used as a dildo, it might be considered hazardous bio waste.
    Hey, there are some weird fetishes and the cultish Mac adherents out there scare me anyway.
    It's not hard to see some lonely outcast out there peggin his bunghole cause the Iphone rubs his prostate "just right"
    It's a strange damn world and nothing Apple does ever surprises me anymore.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:32AM (#30184522)

    I'm a Linux and I smoke weed in my own house, while insulting noobs on the Internet.

  • by Opportunist (166417) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:33AM (#30184544)

    If you're a PC and you're smoking, you need NOSMOKE.EXE [netfunny.com].

    (never thought I'd willingly post that old joke, but it's topical, so...)

  • by Cornwallis (1188489) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:42AM (#30184636)

    After all, 90% of U.S. currency has traces of cocaine on it. I'm pretty sure the Apple store is dealing.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:43AM (#30184640)

    ...so it's third-hand smoke?

  • by Hatta (162192) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:50AM (#30184732) Journal

    You just don't want to see what happens to the computer near the back door.

  • by NEDHead (1651195) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @11:54AM (#30184770)
    Apple - So Easy Even A Smoker Can Do It
  • Re:Wash it (Score:5, Funny)

    by Kugrian (886993) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @12:18PM (#30184998) Homepage

    Only if there's ashtrays in the dishwasher.

  • by Seng (697556) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @12:19PM (#30185004)

    Umm, genius, there are these things in laptops called fans... If you force air out of one orifice, physics dictate that you must have an intake, or else you have a perfect vacuum that would eventually crush the entire laptop.

    So, given we can't violate physics, small particles of ash will eventually get sucked in where they get stuck.

  • by AlamedaStone (114462) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @12:37PM (#30185214)

    But the reefer madness and junk science used by the tobacco prohibitionists has convinced people of the lies that second hand smoke is worse than plutonium. And lawyers and juries and OSHA will enforce these lies that will have employees opening computers in biohazard suits while they will sit quietly on a bench while a diesel bus idles next to them.

    Apple users don't take the bus, you insensitive clod.

  • by gbarules2999 (1440265) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @12:39PM (#30185226)
    iGloves and iMask are an extra $55 on your repair bill.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @12:45PM (#30185318)

    I'm going to keep saying it over and over....

    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company
    Boycot Apple until they shrivel up and go away as quickly as possible...They are an EVIL company

  • by iron-kurton (891451) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @01:47PM (#30185936)
    Because getting nicotine poisoning from touching walls of a smoker's former house got insightful mods too. (welcome to slashdot)
  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @02:23PM (#30186258)

    While it's not Apple, a customer of a store I worked in had problem after problem with a Toshiba laptop. The final time he brought it in (and the final time he was allowed in the store), he'd taken a dump on the keyboard and closed the screen. Not dealing with the issue directly, I don't know if he expected to expedite a replacement or was just venting (literally) in the most disgusting way he could, but the warranty was, I assure you, very solidly voided.

  • by killfixx (148785) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @03:00PM (#30186634) Journal

    Considering the exaggerated cost vs. functionality of Apple products (similar to Sony or Ralph Lauren), people who are snubbed by a blatantly self-serving company shouldn't be offended. What people should be upset by is the militant stance of non-smokers and how "PC" it's become to cow-tow to them. This attitude is just another example of trading freedom for security. Fuck your security. If you can't protect yourself from ignorance, it shouldn't be my job to give up my freedoms to shield you. We've become a species governed by reverse Darwinism, only the weak get what they want. Reach deep and find your balls (metaphorical), stop bitching and forcing your opinions about how I should live my life.

    You should be free to live with your own mistakes and triumphs. Just don't expect me to suffer for them.

    Apple has an obligation to repair broken parts. There is no warning or clause that covers cigarette tar and it's effects on the inner-workings of your computer. Also, will they repair your computer of it's damaged by a virus or willful acts of ignorance?

    Take some fucking responsibility.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @06:42PM (#30188664)

    Apple users prefer LSD right?

  • Re:Wash it (Score:2, Funny)

    by mikechant (729173) on Saturday November 21, 2009 @06:53PM (#30188762)

    I would note that despite myself and my wife smoking fairly heavily in the same room as our previous PC, it did actually take *nine years* before it burst into blue flames...

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 21, 2009 @07:18PM (#30189020)

    No, the solution is to hire smokers to work on smokers' computers.

Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.

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