Tiger Woods Signs Deal To Be Apple Spokeperson 172
varmittang writes "Tiger Woods has signed a long-term deal with Apple Computers as Mac OS X 'Tiger' spokesperson. He's apparently trying to align himself with the 'best brands' in each market, and Apple just seemed like the right pick." From the article: "Tiger Woods and Apple Computer is the perfect marriage, with both of us striving to be the best. With OS X, Apple is the industry innovator in operating systems and our 'Tiger+Tiger' partnership help tell the world about the benefits of using Mac OS X...Others are now following OS X's taillights, and 'Tiger+Tiger' will make it even harder for them to ever catch up."
It's too bad (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It's too bad (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It's too bad (Score:1)
Neither one can beat their competition.
Re:It's too bad (Score:3, Funny)
Re:It's too bad (Score:1)
Re:It's too bad (Score:5, Funny)
Count Chocula felt that it was a perfect fit as Microsoft likes to suck the life from its competitors and money from the pockets of the masses much like the Count sucks the blood from the living.
"It's a great match", the Count was heard to remark while feasting upon yet another young victim, "Microsoft and I both wind up with mindless zombies, willing to do the bidding of their master". The use of the word zombie in relation to Microsoft apparently refers to the term used for computers on the internet which were compromised and under the control of someone else, typically running a Microsoft product.
Re:It's too bad (Score:1)
Re:It's too bad (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It's too bad (Score:1)
In related news... (Score:3, Funny)
"The Count has been an integral part of our GM team for 34 years. Any money sucking he will be doing will be into General Mills' coffers, not some two-bit meat packing company", apparently referring to the upcoming Longhorn release of Microsoft's flagship product. "We look forward to maintaining the productive relationship between the Count and worldwide youth for many years to
April Fools Day... (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:April Fools Day... (Score:1)
Great news! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Great news! (Score:2)
Re:Great news! (Score:2)
Just wait until Buick unveils the Apple Special Edition Buick LeSabre. Built-in iPod, OS X based nav system and cute Apple logo trim. Think different!
Go On . . . (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Go On . . . (Score:2)
Does this mean? (Score:3, Insightful)
well, at least i had to think about this one (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:well, at least i had to think about this one (Score:2)
The article seems reasonable enough, and mentions many of the sorts of tie-ins that I might expect.
Re:well, at least i had to think about this one (Score:2)
Re:well, at least i had to think about this one (Score:2)
So is it... (Score:1, Funny)
-or-
tiger^2
I think this is important, as it's plain to see that tiger^2 would yield a much more powerful result
Re:So is it... (Score:1)
Re:So is it... (Score:2)
Re:So is it... (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:So is it... (Score:2)
tiger=2?
Re:So is it... (Score:3, Funny)
in the case that X=2
X+X=2+2=4
X^2=2^2=4
equal results.
Now let's look at the case for decreasing results
in the case that X=1
X+X=1+1=2
X^2=1^2=1
or, in the case that X=.5
X+X=.5+.5=1
X^2=.5^2=.25
now, we know that apple has a 3% market share. That means that tiger=0.03. So lets figure this out.
tiger+tiger=0.03+0.03=0.06 or 6% market share
tiger^2=0.03^2=0.0009 or 0.09% market share
So, obviously a tiger^2 technique would
Re:So is it... (Score:2)
Re:So is it... (Score:1)
But can you play Tiger Woods golf on a Mac? (Score:1)
Together We Can Get Through This (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Together We Can Get Through This (Score:3, Insightful)
Tiger+Tiger? Bah! Tiger^3! (Score:1)
Mac OS X 10.4 Tiger
Tiger Woods[1]
[1] Yes, I realize this is an April Fool's joke. Duh.
[2] Yes, it will be an additional install. And no, Mac OS X isn't a second rate Java platform; it's just that Mac OS X isn't one of Sun's Tier 1 platforms for which it develops Java itself. Apple has no choice but to wait for certain milestones to be reached, and then essenti
Re:Tiger+Tiger? Bah! Tiger^3! (Score:1)
Slashdot... (Score:5, Funny)
Quick! Have a baby and name him LongHorn! (Score:2, Funny)
Name him LongHorn!
Re:Quick! Have a baby and name him LongHorn! (Score:2)
If Apple truly wanted to market "Tiger" with a Tiger, I'd suggest the soon to be AL Central Division Winners... the Detroit Tigers, instead of a golfer who quite honestly has been Vijay Singh's bitch lately.
Oh well - other than that, thi
Re:Quick! Have a baby and name him LongHorn! (Score:4, Funny)
Nah, MS will just open up an Austin office, to associate themselves with the University of Texas Longhorns (who are going to get absolutely creamed by Ohio State - mark my words. Ted Ginn Jr. is unstoppable, and Troy Smith hung more yards than anyone else on Michigan..).
I went to the University of Oklahoma, you insensitive clod!
(we hate [okiebob7.net] Texas!)
Re:Quick! Have a baby and name him LongHorn! (Score:2)
I'd like to see OU play Ohio State. Ohio State's defense is vastly underrated - especially A.J. Hawk. Man that guy can fly to the ball. Oklahoma also has a great defense, and as far as offense - Adrian Peterson vs. Ted Ginn - two heisman candidates squaring off -
Re:Quick! Have a baby and name him LongHorn! (Score:1)
Hello? Kevorkian? Do you make house calls?
Golf . . . System Software? (Score:1)
When I first read this it seemed like hollow marketing hype. Then I remembered Tiger's renowned driver skills.
Man, I made myself groan with that one.
-Peter
Why do I even bother? (Score:2, Insightful)
Maybe.
Re:Why do I even bother? (Score:2)
On April Fools, the trick is finding the real stuff in a bunch of fake articles, the rest of the year, it's the other way around.
Trust no one.
Long Term? (Score:1)
just for my trusty 360/40 here keeping the house warm. man, look at that electical meter spin...
Re:Long Term? (Score:2)
just for my trusty 360/40 here keeping the house warm. man, look at that electical meter spin...
Hmmmmm... has anyone written a 360/BAL emulator recently... maybe for PowerPC ?
runs off and looks for my ancient copy of the P.O.O.
Nothing but the best (Score:5, Funny)
Yes, because we know that Buick makes the best cars in the world.
Re:Nothing but the best (Score:1)
Re:Nothing but the best (Score:2)
Buick doesn't make cars.
They build excitement!
What next? (Score:2)
Microsoft to partner with Krusty the Clown?
Re:What next? (Score:2)
- Microsoft to partner with Krusty the Clown?
More like George SteinbrennerRe:What next? (Score:2)
doesn't it suck when... (Score:5, Funny)
I can't wait till we go back to dupes and typos again.
I hate april 1st. Worst day of the year.
Re:doesn't it suck when... (Score:2)
Don't loose hope! We mite get another set of story's, regarding the Prsident [slashdot.org] soon!
New Apple add available at apple.com/quicktime (Score:1)
[tiger woods]: The new Apple Tiger, it's Grrreeeeaaaat!!!
bo
Stupid April 1 (Score:2, Redundant)
Multiyear deal? How? (Score:2)
Ya ya... I should lighten up, I know.
Swap Spokespersons Please (Score:1)
Re:Swap Spokespersons Please (Score:2)
Fore! (Score:2, Interesting)
april 1 is dumb (Score:1)
Um. compare that picture of Woods with an Apple logo'd hat with this picture [weblogger.com]. Stupid April 1...
By Siddhartha Finch (Score:5, Informative)
Re:By Siddhartha Finch (Score:2)
Cheers,
Richard
Re:By Siddhartha Finch (Score:2)
In a moment... (Score:5, Insightful)
Sorry, guys, but this is getting real old, real fast. Unless the whole joke is pissing your users off with fake stories so you can say "Ha! Pissed you off!"
Re:In a moment... (Score:1)
In which time zone ? Im currently in British Summer Time.
Re:In a moment... (Score:2)
Aren't the April Foolsday jokes meant to stop..... (Score:2, Insightful)
what you say? (Score:1)
Yes, all those other companies selling operating systems for Apple computers have no chance to survive make their time NOW!
Marketing (Score:3, Insightful)
Speaking as a Business Major, it always amazes me to what levels of mindless drivel we can achieve to market a product without even the remotest feeling of embarrassment.
Re:Marketing (Score:2)
tiger + tiger (Score:2)
While Horse is Dead (Score:1)
Maybe a better choice... (Score:1)
You're Fired. (Score:1)
Have some fun folks! (Score:1)
In other news... (Score:2)
Tyger tyger... (Score:1)
In the forests of the night:
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
Can someone explain the joke (Score:2)
Time for real news (Score:1)
How would we feel if CNN decided to spend the entire day fabricating each and every one of their stories? Credibility would go down and people would become annoyed that the station didn't choose to grow up (per say) and continue with their real job af
Re:Time for real news (Score:2)
You're new here, aren't you?
Re:Time for real news (Score:1)
Re:Time for real news (Score:2)
Well for once I thought it was appropriate.
What the hell is Slashdot all about if it's not for the indulgence and mutual back-patting and self-congratulation of geeks?
And I don't give a fuck about "karma".
Re:Time for real news (Score:1)
I don't care about the commentings geeks, just the stories that bring news to my attention.
Re:Time for real news (Score:2, Funny)
In other words, business as usual for Slashdot.
Ah, but it's a slippery slope we'd be starting on, if we curtailed our April Fooling activities:
Apple Hires DVD Jon (Score:1)
Well, obviously... (Score:1)
*ducks from hail of thrown objects*
Best? (Score:4, Insightful)
Riiight, that must be what led him to endorse Buick [golftoday.co.uk]. Not the 8-figure contract.
'Tiger+Tiger' (Score:2)
A new OS, Mac addict's delight!
Re:'Tiger+Tiger' (Score:1)
Re:'Tiger+Tiger' (Score:2)
His choice best brand is his wife (Score:1)
Blake fans? (Score:2, Funny)
like a Photo iPod in the night,
what graphic designer's hand or eye,
dare pixellate thy symmetry.
Tiger Looking for Work (Score:1)
I hate April Fool's Day (Score:1)
Proof this is Fake (Score:2)
Sayeth the author:
today we are proud to announce the immediate availability of Tiger Woods PGA TOUR® 2005 for Mac OS X 10.4 "Tiger." With Apple now bundling Tiger Woods PGA TOUR® 2005 free with every new Macintosh. . .
Apple would NEVER allow a product announcement like this - especially so close to the next WWDC. I will grant though that using the subjects' canned press release endings at the end was a nice touch.
Doesn't Tiger keep losing?? (Score:2)
An April Fools joke - right (Score:2)
I mean if you suspend disbelieve for a moment what part of the item as posted could not be part of an actual press release by a marketing type?
Lets face it the way Tiger is playing right now, this would guarantee the product was at least occasionally pushed right. :-(
Leaked ad copy (Score:2)
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire of thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand dare seize the fire?
And what shoulder, and what art,
Could twist the sinews of thy heart,
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand? and what dread feet?
What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? what dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors cl
This is great. (Score:2)