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Steve Jobs Recommends Android For Fans of Porn 909

Posted by CmdrTaco
from the only-flashers-own-trenchcoats dept.
hansamurai writes "After being asked about the App Store's recent ban on 'sexy apps,' Steve Jobs responded, 'We do believe we have a moral responsibility to keep porn off the iPhone. Folks who want porn can buy an Android phone. You know, there's a porn store for Android, you can download nothing but porn. You can download porn, your kids can download porn. That's a place we don't want to go, so we're not going to go there.' Apps such as Playboy's and the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition are still available on the App Store, however, as they come from 'more reputable companies.'"
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Steve Jobs Recommends Android For Fans of Porn

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  • by hansraj (458504) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:15PM (#31926140)

    Or he only watches "reputable porn"?

  • by maugle (1369813) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:15PM (#31926144)
    Sales of Android phones increased 1000%.
    • Re:In other news... (Score:4, Informative)

      by mikael_j (106439) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:16PM (#31926168)

      For about ten minutes before customers realized that they could still get porn using Safari and that iTunes gladly lets them transfer their porn videos to the iPhone.

      • by exabrial (818005) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:18PM (#31926226)
        Is there porn on the itunes store? Or are you using an illegal method to transfer licensed content to a playback medium not covered by the origanal license?
        • Re:In other news... (Score:5, Informative)

          by MBGMorden (803437) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:37PM (#31926702)

          Ripping a DVD for your own use is legal. DECRYPTING it with an unauthorized backup tool is not thanks to the DMCA, but the vast majority of porn DVD's have no copy protection, in which case the DMCA doesn't come into play.

          Not to mention that there are sites that already cater to this. www.videobox.com for example even has an "iPod" option on their video downloads that downloads a MPEG4 file already optimized for placeback on an iPod, that will import straight into iTunes. Completely legal, and works fine.

      • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

        by gstoddart (321705)

        For about ten minutes before customers realized that they could still get porn using Safari and that iTunes gladly lets them transfer their porn videos to the iPhone.

        You know, being among that (apparently small) group of people who only use my phone for phone calls ... I am completely baffled as to why anyone would want porn on their phone. I just can't imagine where I'd be that porn on my phone would be what I most needed.

        Then again, I don't text, surf the web, or any of half a dozen things with my cell p

      • by MMInterface (1039102) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @02:05PM (#31927390)
        Unfortunately most of the streaming porn that people watch on their browsers is in Flash. The same problem exists with streaming sites that play for foreign dramas. Even if HTML5 really catches on it will generally be for mainstream content. The iTunes thing is kind of a pain. Downloaded videos are rarely in a format that iTunes will recognize. You have to convert your whole library to their format which is time consuming. Porn is more of a spontaneous activity. If your not in the mood to watch it immediately you aren't going to be in the mood to convert your porn files to an iPad friendly format.
    • by JWSmythe (446288) <jwsmytheNO@SPAMjwsmythe.com> on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:30PM (#31926518) Homepage Journal

          I was going to say, that's the best marketing the Android could have hoped for. "It does everything ours does *AND* can do porn." The adult industries have been a driving force for centuries, and Apple making a pseudo-clean environment isn't going to change that at all.

      • by MoonBuggy (611105) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:49PM (#31926964) Journal

        Not only is the actual availability of porn a potential driving force, Apple has just shattered their facade of being a "cool, forward thinking company".

        As I said in another comment, their core market is young, rich, art/media types. Apple have far less of a need than many to worry about the older, more conservative buyers. Using porn as the bogeyman just isn't going to fly with young people - trying to drag an opponent's name through the mud by associating it with something that plenty of people now consider harmless just makes Apple look out of touch.

      • by Applekid (993327) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:52PM (#31927062)

        I was going to say, that's the best marketing the Android could have hoped for. "It does everything ours does *AND* can do porn." The adult industries have been a driving force for centuries, and Apple making a pseudo-clean environment isn't going to change that at all.

        Perhaps. But Jobs was definitely trying to inspire some FUD (in this case, fear) against the Android when he said "You can download porn, your kids can download porn..."

    • by Monkeedude1212 (1560403) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:30PM (#31926520) Journal

      You know, we joke about it, but whatever the porn industry backs usually ends up being the winner in format wars.

      Blu Ray, VHS...

      The only favour you're doing is helping droids, not iPhone customers.

  • by DrLang21 (900992) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:16PM (#31926158)
    Suddenly I really like Android.
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by Anonymous Coward

      Are you happy to see me or is that an Android phone in your pocket?

  • Stupid argument (Score:5, Insightful)

    by assantisz (881107) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:17PM (#31926180)
    And iPhone users (including children) don't have access to porn? Last time I checked (guilty as charged!) there are iPhone specific streaming sites for porn. Instead of going to the app store all they have to open up Safari and google for the goodies.
  • by Conspiracy_Of_Doves (236787) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:17PM (#31926184)

    Is it my imagination, or is Steve being more douchey than usual?

  • by fuzzyfuzzyfungus (1223518) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:17PM (#31926192) Journal
    He is really being a dick there. There's a "porn store" for the iPhone as well, called "Mobile Safari". If anything, the prices are lower.

    However, if he is going to be an asshole he should have gone just a little further... Something to the effect of "And the inferior multitouch support won't bother you nearly as much if you are always using your phone one-handed..."
  • by Gizzmonic (412910) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:17PM (#31926196) Homepage Journal

    Steve, buddy! Thanks for the recommendations, I'm a huge fan of pr0n. Could you also recommend pr0n-friendly restaurants, hotels, bakeries etc?

  • Sure Steve (Score:4, Informative)

    by jDeepbeep (913892) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:18PM (#31926204)
    As if applications are the only porn vector. Let's get rid of Safari too while we're at it.
  • I don't need (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Beelzebud (1361137) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:18PM (#31926206)
    I don't need Apple to act as a morality police for what I do with something I own.
  • Okay (Score:5, Insightful)

    by 99BottlesOfBeerInMyF (813746) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:18PM (#31926222)

    Steve Jobs responded, "We do believe we have a moral responsibility to keep porn off the iPhone. Folks who want porn can buy an Android phone. "

    Well, I don't see that porn is particularly harmful to children, especially compared to the violence in media and games sold on the iPhone, so I don't know why one would be a moral imperative and the other would not. I actually think this is marketing, designed to appeal to parents who want their kids kept safe from the evils of... umm... boobies?

    But that's okay. If he's recommending an Android phone, I'll probably take him up on it when I purchase a smartphone.

  • by Colin Smith (2679) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:19PM (#31926230)

    Apple products are for girly men... Or not.

    • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

      by ErkDemon (1202789)

      Well, an iPhone/iPad isn't exactly the most macho-looking bit of hi-technology, is it?

      Every time I see a woman carrying an iPhone, it seemed to be bulked up with big chunky covers and accessories, presumably because otherwise it just looks too girlie.

      If you look at it, and track back the design vocabulary of the back and the rim and the little round button, the design ethos is essentially classic ladies jewelery. The silver-backed iPod Touch looks like what you'd expect a Chanel silver-backed ladies' hair

  • by Anonymusing (1450747) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:19PM (#31926236)

    This is marketing-speak for "We're going to be opening the Apple Porn Store very soon. You think the rigid curves of our multi-touch sensors are cool? You ain't seen nothing. Wait for Steve Jobs to say, 'And one more thing.'"

  • Smart move. (Score:3, Insightful)

    by beckett (27524) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:20PM (#31926250) Homepage Journal

    Jobs simultaneously drags the android through the mud while claiming a moral high ground for the iphone. what's Google going to do? Trying to defend pornography will be an uphill battle going to a place "where we don't want to go".

    nicely played.

    • Re:Smart move. (Score:5, Insightful)

      by SoupGuru (723634) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:24PM (#31926380)
      Right... there's no way Google could ever come out looking like a good guy.

      "We let our users choose what to download."

      Hmmm...
      • Wrong thinking (Score:4, Insightful)

        by wonkavader (605434) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:44PM (#31926868)

        He's not going to get techies this way.

        But he's not going to lose the iPhone-is-neato customers, and he's not going to lose the if Apple made a toilet I'd buy it crowd. Those groups either don't care that they're restricted, don't know they're restricted, or actually want to be restricted.

        He's saying this for consumption by the media. It's a nice buzz-bit. "Android is for porn." The media will repeat it because it's pithy and uses a titillating word. And the folks who have no clue about restrictions will repeat this to themselves when they go to buy a phone. Wives will insist that husbands buy iPhones for themselves and for the kids.

        This is not Jobs being stupid. This is both genius and an indication that Jobs is very, very afraid. His control-everything system depends on him being the master of really the only very good phone/tablet system. There's another system and pretty soon it'll be good enough to make his look less revolutionary. He needs another way to keep his silo full.

    • Re:Smart move. (Score:4, Insightful)

      by pla (258480) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:28PM (#31926484) Journal
      Jobs simultaneously drags the android through the mud while claiming a moral high ground for the iphone. what's Google going to do? Trying to defend pornography will be an uphill battle going to a place "where we don't want to go".

      I dunno... In Google's shoes, I'd respond to this with a one (and a half) sentence press release, something to the effect of "44% of all internet searches look for porn, and 97% of all households have searched for porn-related terms more than once. Android - For people who value freedom"
    • Re:Smart move. (Score:5, Interesting)

      by copponex (13876) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:32PM (#31926564) Homepage

      I guess Sergey could say he remembers what it was like being under the thumb of a hopeless totalitarian dickhole from his time living in Soviet Era Russia. So, if you want the same experience of someone else deciding what you can and cannot have access to, shackle yourself to an iPhone.

      (By the way, Steve Jobs is the same guy who denied paternity while his daughter and former girlfriend lived on welfare. I don't think he has any solid footing on the moral high ground.)

    • Re:Smart move. (Score:5, Insightful)

      by QuasiEvil (74356) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:41PM (#31926782)

      Simple, you don't answer the porn charge directly. You instead talk about how Android is about user choice and user freedom, rather than what putzfuck Jobs decrees "acceptable" for you to use.

    • Re:Smart move. (Score:4, Interesting)

      by MoonBuggy (611105) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:43PM (#31926844) Journal

      Depends who you're marketing to. The pro-porn stance might not win you a majority in the overall population, but Apple may well have shot themselves in the foot when it comes to their most loyal customers.

      Sure, smartphones are heading for the mainstream now, but the core audience (probably even more so for the iPhone than most others) is young, affluent, media-minded types. That just happens to intersect almost exactly with the segment of the population who are likely to be particularly liberal and progressively minded, the ones who are quite comfortable with sex.

      Banning the apps was one thing, but actively using the availability of porn as a negative against Android sounds like something from the 1950s. All this has done is made me think of Jobs as old and out of touch.

  • by Third Position (1725934) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:21PM (#31926296)

    You know, there's a porn store for Android, you can download nothing but porn. You can download porn, your kids can download porn.

    How does he know?

  • by initdeep (1073290) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:23PM (#31926340)

    After being asked about the App Store's recent ban on "sexy apps," Steve Jobs responded, "We do believe we have a moral responsibility to keep porn out of the app store to keep the moronic soccer moms off our ass. Folks who want porn can just use safari and browse to it like a normal person. You know, there's plenty of porn available on the iPhone, and plenty of gay porn hookup apps that soccer moms won't even notice. You can download porn via the browser, or any number of "respectable" apps from companies that make us a lot of money like Playboy and Sports Illustrated , your kids can download porn on their iPhones faster than we can attempt to block it, so we just come up with some lame ass story for the soccer mom's and they buy it because they are fucking pathetically stupid. That's a place we don't want to go, blocking safari, because we know kids will find their porn via browser anyway, so we're not going to go there."

  • Getting scary (Score:5, Insightful)

    by nlawalker (804108) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:25PM (#31926384)

    "We do believe we have a moral responsibility to keep porn off the iPhone."

    Apple's only moral responsibility is to let their users do whatever they feel like, and they have failed.

    The "Apple cult" image tossed around as a joke and an insult is becoming more and more true every day. You can't simply buy a device from Apple - you have to buy their device, their software, their platform, and their tastes, desires and morals too, and once you do, you can't separate any of them. This isn't vendor lock-in, it's religion.

  • by SirWhoopass (108232) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:27PM (#31926444)
    Didn't Sony pretty much take the exact same stance with their Betamax format? How did that work out for them?
  • The Chinese Apple. (Score:4, Interesting)

    by BlueKitties (1541613) <bluekitties616@gmail.com> on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @01:28PM (#31926474)
    Apple has a moral responsibility to provide only high quality apps, and sees that it is necessary to forbid anyone from using their iPhone if they do not abide by their rules; This includes banning porn, and politically sensitive matters. China has a moral responsibility to provide only the highest quality websites, and sees that it is necessary to forbid anyone from using their Internet if they do not abide by their rules; This includes banning porn, and politically sensitive matters.
  • by killmenow (184444) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @02:09PM (#31927490)
    Is the extreme hypocrisy of allowing SI swimsuit and Playboy apps but saying "We don't allow porn."

    Look, it is my well educated opinion that Playboy, soft-core BS, swimsuit calendars/photoshoots, and basically the societal desire to objectify women through "moral" sexualizations causes MORE harm than XXX hard core pornography does. Why? Because it's insidious and sends terrible messages to people and messes with their psyches. It's OK to objectify and look at women sexually as long AS LONG AS THERE'S NO SEX INVOLVED?! But, wait, isn't that the point? Oh, no, it's better to get guys hot and bothered with teases and pics of scantily clad women everywhere and then tell them "SEX IS BAD!!!" than it is to show them videos of ACTUAL SEX and saying, "Meh, it's just sex." REALLY?? This is the moral stance??? It's OK to have Janet Jackson sing about sexual topics, dress sluttily and grind her body against a man in a mock sexual ritual but "HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!! 0.5 SECONDS OF TIT JUST FLASHED ACROSS MY TV SCREEN!!!" That messes with people's heads and gives them warped ideas about sexuality and women.

    So Steve Jobs can keep his "moral" porn and I'll hang on to the stuff that doesn't pander to me and send me mixed messages about what's right and wrong, what's ok and what's dirty, and enjoy the wisdom of knowing IT'S ALL ABOUT SEX without pretending "sex but not sex" is somehow better than just sex without all the BS.
  • by JustNiz (692889) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @02:10PM (#31927494)

    >> Playboy's and the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition are still available on the App Store, however, as they come from 'more reputable companies

    Ahh so kids seeing "reputable" porn is OK then ehh Steve? ... Obviously this actually has nothing to do with porn and all to do with licencing revenue.

  • by Symbha (679466) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @03:28PM (#31929438)

    That the internet was built on porn.
    Apple has not learned their lesson from the years when they were irrelevant.

  • by An dochasac (591582) on Wednesday April 21, 2010 @03:31PM (#31929504)
    No Pr0n:Betamax, Laserdisc, Afghanistan, iPad,
    Pr0n: VHS, DVD, Las Vegas, Google Android

    Thank's for the tip Mr. Jobs!

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