Hospital Confirms Steve Jobs's Liver Transplant 402
CNet is reporting that the hospital where Apple's CEO reportedly got a liver transplant two months ago has now confirmed the truth of these reports. "Steve Jobs underwent his liver transplant about two months ago at Methodist University Hospital in Memphis, the hospital confirmed Tuesday. Jobs, who returned to work Apple's campus in Cupertino, Calif., on Monday after a six-month medical leave, 'is now recovering well and has an excellent prognosis,' according to a statement by Dr. James D. Eason, the program director of the Methodist University Hospital Transplant Institute. ... While Eason said the confirmation was being provided with Jobs's approval, he cited patient confidentially in saying that he could not reveal any further information on the specifics of Jobs's surgery."
I did not think that (Score:5, Funny)
Funny that (Score:5, Funny)
Steve Jobs 3.0 (Score:3, Funny)
Yes, but the Steve Jobs update adds new features such as cut and paste, MMS, Spotlight search and an improved calendar!
Re:I did not think that (Score:3, Funny)
They are if they come from virgin first borne children swapped for an iPhone 3GS upgrade.
What the doctor didn't confirm... (Score:5, Funny)
Apple will house the new weapon, tentatively codenamed iDontThinkSo in an underground bunker beneath their Cupertino campus.
Because of Mr Jobs' prolific temper, executives were initially concerned about the potential for misuse the weapon presented and the possibility of its use against enemies who were not truly dire. For this reason, a killswitch was installed to be controlled remotely via Phil Schiller's iPhone.
Analysts predict the new weapon will bolster the company's share price by at least 20% and should by them enough time to complete the fully cybernetic Jobs 2.0.
Re:Public Figure Vs HIPAA, HIPAA Wins! (Score:5, Funny)
Parts (Score:5, Funny)
Maybe now he'll understand why it's so important to be able to install third-party parts and he'll decide to loosen-up the licensing a little bit.
A good bet (Score:4, Funny)
Re:How long was the wait? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:This is actually a new Apple product (Score:5, Funny)
And when he takes his shirt off you can see the backlit apple logo they installed, which also mysteriously doubled the cost of the operation.
I heard he was having a heart transplant (Score:3, Funny)
but they couldn't find his old one.
Re:Public Figure Vs HIPAA, HIPAA Wins! (Score:5, Funny)
Well a double-dumbass on you, sir!
Re:Can't spare the time (Score:3, Funny)
Which is worse:
* The First Poster who blows his own post away by failing to quote out of context to confuse readers into thinking he had a point
or
* The guy with mod points that mods said poster up and then posts as AC to clear said mod?
Signed,
The Second Dumbass
Re:How is appel fourmed? (Score:3, Funny)
They need to do way instain doner> who spilt thar libres. becaise these bibers cabt fight back it was on the news this mronign a boss in memps who had bight on his liber. They ar had him company for two month and back for new liber. Only just now the talm abiyt it! Probly even deed alraidy!
I received my delivery yesterday... (Score:5, Funny)
This is going to go well with Fava beans and a nice Chianti
Re:How long was the wait? (Score:3, Funny)
So it was a lie (Score:5, Funny)
A apple a day, doesn't keep the doctor away.
Re:I did not think that (Score:4, Funny)
That might result in you needing a liver transplant.
Re:I feel anger. (Score:2, Funny)
He's created jobs, lots of them
Yes - he created "Jobs". 4 of them to be specific. *nods* I suppose you could say that it's a lot, in some parts of the States. What does this have to do with the fundamental aspects of economy?
;)
(or would that be Jobs'?)
Re:I feel dirty (Score:3, Funny)
And there are a whole boatload of people who go to AA and never kick the habit. You can't just count successes and declare yourself helpful. There's never been any scientific study of AA effectiveness and the whole emphasis on converting people to christian values makes it entirely suspect.
Enough was disclosed (Score:3, Funny)
e.g. cancer or AIDS or something else as serious as that.
You don't announce a hormonal imbalance that's not serious that way (he couldn't even appear in public!). Well unless he was changing gender (either voluntarily or involuntarily
So if you would sell/buy Apple stock just because Jobs is very sick, you should have done it the day they said "hormonal imbalance". But most "investors" won't do that - they'll just wait for someone to start first.
It's just like when Alan Greenspan says "irrational exuberance". He's not going to come out and say "Uh everyone, sell! Sell! Sell!". That would be irresponsible and stupid of him.
You want the sheep to move in a particular direction, but not rush off the cliff together.
In Related News ... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:I feel anger. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Parts (Score:5, Funny)
After becoming irate, he is told to STFW and RTFM. At 8:00am, bleary eyed from searching endless forums he calls up work and tells them he's sick and won't be coming in until he's better. 6 months later, he takes a shower, ready to head back to work after finally fixing his problem himself.
He gazes up at the enormous face of the penguin. Eighteen years it had taken him to learn what kind of smile was hidden beneath the dark feathers. O cruel, needless misunderstanding! O stubborn, self-willed exile from the loving breast! Two gin-scented tears trickled down the sides of his nose. But it was all right, everything was all right, the struggle was finished. He had won the victory over himself. He loved Linux.
Re:How long was the wait? (Score:3, Funny)
He's a time lord.
Re:There's no reason to be angry. (Score:3, Funny)
Let's not forget: any number of Apple fans would probably readily line up to give their liver to Steve! Fame can be more useful than wealth.
There's probably an iPhone app for it.
Re:I feel anger. (Score:3, Funny)