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History Repeats Itself — Mac & the iPad 514

Posted by CmdrTaco
from the it's-all-just-a-matter-of-history-repeating dept.
Keith found an interesting story telling a bit about how Steve Jobs operates. It involves small teams of young engineers willing to work 90-hour weeks in total secrecy, and a complete willingness to throw away bad ideas without flowery language. The iPad is surprisingly similar to the Mac."
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History Repeats Itself — Mac & the iPad

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  • First Post? (Score:2, Funny)

    by Ornlu (1706502) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @09:36AM (#31909110)
    Does that mean it's about as useful as a BOAT ANCHOR!?
  • by AHuxley (892839) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @09:50AM (#31909264) Homepage Journal
    When burned out all they get a non-compete clause and a life of poverty.
    With a cult you get the reality of a UFO, a real boarding pass and the applesauce works for everybody.
  • The Mac? (Score:4, Funny)

    by VGPowerlord (621254) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @09:51AM (#31909278) Homepage

    No, no, no...

    You went one generation too far.

    The iPad is surprisingly similar to the Lisa.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @09:55AM (#31909350)

    A giant customized Starbucks in Cupertino California where lattes and no soy skim macchiatos are given out free to all employees. The background music involves a playlist of Nora Jones, David Matthews, John Mayer, and Bono on loop from an Ipod docked somewhere in the Apple/Starbucks facility. Hours are long but morale is surprising high as developers, hardware and software, are given 30 minute breaks to masturbate to the new itunes interface.

    All developers sit at cafe type tables with a Mac Book Pro while their lord and master Steve Jobs stands deskless in his predictable attire of a turtleneck and jeans. In fact, this is the preferred (mandatory) dress code at Apple. Jobs walks around to each and every department, separated by latte and vegan preferences, and checks on the performance and efficiency of his developers. At any given point in the day one may see Mr Jobs yelling at a programmer for not implementing a button in the perfect shade of corn flower blue (#6495ED) and immediately sends him to the apple punitive chamber, consisting of a HP Compaq running Vista Basic.

    There are 2 software development departments and 2 hardware development sections in Apple. For software there is the Apple core team, Apple Open Source team. In hardware there is the Apple systems and management team and the iDevice team. Since the OSX kernel consists of a BSD darwin kernel there is no real need for low level programmers and as such the entirety of the Apple core team consists of UI designers and photoshop junkies. All software churned out from the core team is designed in a program strikingly similar to Visual Studio's form designer but with Cocoa Objective C generated instead. The 16 hour day (Jobs demands 16 hour days since he himself never sleeps) of a core dev involves lining up the right shade of chrome with the latest photoshopped graphite button and maintaining the correct color scheme, not an easy job at all.

    The Apple open source team involves a little bit more coding, which is mandated to be done in TextEdit or the option of a $80 third party mac text editor. The Apple open source team doesn't actually create much code but searches the internet for interesting BSD licensed software and modifies it as it's own through obfuscation and conversion to objective C. Many of the items a mac user sees comes from the open source world stamped by apple such as the ability to play music taken from 67 different originally linux based players, CD burning, and the overall ability to click a mouse. Apple's legal department has no qualms about this practice and has assured many that since most of the code is BSD and if any is GPLed many Linux hippies should be grateful that Apple fostered WebKit by using KHTML and adding some Gecko bloat. Perhaps one of the most important items that the open source team has done to date is use parts of the FreeBSD to keep the kernel up to date.

    There's not much to say about the Apple systems and management team. I suppose they can be classified in to desktop and laptop systems. Because hardware work is beneath Apple in general and thought of being only worthy of Windows Users and as such can be found working on these beauties in the starbucks bathroom. Desktops are currently made by buying dell machines and putting them in Lian Li cases, where the majority of the costs goes to buying titanium Apple emblems to paste on the sides. Laptops consists of the rebranding of only the most silver and black Sony Viaos but talk has been going around about rebranding Asus EeePCs for a new Apple netbook but you didn't hear that from me, for fear of my life.

    The iDevice team's job is to develop for the ipod, iphone, itouch, and many other portable electronics apple may release in the future. Their jobs are very interconnected with the open source team as well as the core dev team. Using firmware from random samsung devices and giving it an OSX skin the ipod stands as a shining example that infringement only applies to greasy file sharers and that the music player remains the best in market

  • by Thanshin (1188877) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @09:57AM (#31909392)

    I use my iPad at home, you probably won't see me walking around with it.

    I'd be ashamed too.

    You could paint it orange and pretend it's a brick.

    Or glue some hair to it, a rope, and pretend you're walking a chihuahua.

  • Re:iPad... (Score:1, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:06AM (#31909554)

    There are a lot of fanboys with sand in their vaginas, Apple had to do something

  • by taoye (1456551) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:24AM (#31909804)
    Can I order it without the iPMS feature?
  • by Raffaello (230287) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:28AM (#31909850)

    WARNING!

    You have submitted a post containing elements of reading comprehension and nuanced logic. This will not be tolerated here. All posts must be one of:

    - Humor (soviet russia, hot grits, indeterminate overlords, etc.)
    - Troll (microsoft baiting, apple baiting, linux baitinc, etc.)
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    - Autistic Spectrum Disorder Verbal Manifestation (excessively literal minded application of first order predicate logic with as few points of reference as possible to the original article or the real world)

    You have been warned!
    In future, any posts not meeting these guidelines will be auto-moderated to:
    (Score: 0, Thinking Human Being)

  • Re:iPad... (Score:3, Funny)

    by geminidomino (614729) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:34AM (#31909962) Journal

    Anything created by Microsoft also sounds like it's from a line of hygiene products - hasn't stopped them so far..

    I don't know what kind of women you know who would use such a product named "Visual Studio." Eww.

  • Re:iPad... (Score:3, Funny)

    by iapetus (24050) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:35AM (#31909974) Homepage

    Surreptitiously cover up the 'io' with your thumb and it gets more appealing to some.

  • Re:iPad... (Score:2, Funny)

    by somersault (912633) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:47AM (#31910128) Homepage Journal

    I was referring more to the "Microsoft" part, it's a perfect brand name for a line of feminine hygiene products.

  • by segedunum (883035) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @10:51AM (#31910202)
    For anyone who doesn't know what is meant by a boat anchor then watch Hunter Cressell's highly amusing (and still the best) Mac parody:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg7Xh0m_Oco [youtube.com]

    A lot of it is outdated, but stuff like the filesystem stuff is still true. That always makes me laugh as I had to do it many years ago: "You run to the store to buy the Mac version of Norton Utilities, you run back only for Norton to go 'You idiot! You own a Macintosh! The file is fucking gone!'"
  • by t-twisted (937590) on Tuesday April 20, 2010 @11:41AM (#31911078)

    If I have a beef with the iPad, it's that while it's a lovely device for consuming content, it doesn't do much to facilitate its creation.

    Yes, Grossman does get it right. That is my disappointment too. The iPad is all about consuming content, being a consumer. It is unlike a PC which can be used to create content. The iPad is a passive device.

    On a related note, I am disappointed that my purchase of a TV does not allow me to create TV shows!

    There is an egregious mismatch between what the iPad IS and what people WANT it to be going on in this thread. There are more than enough tools to create right now, the iPad is a revolutionary way to deliver what's created to the consumer. The Time article missed the point while making the point.

  • I think you missed the memo. We're supposed to hate this device because it's made by Apple.

Aren't you glad you're not getting all the government you pay for now?

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