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This Is Apple's Next iPhone 492

Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:15AM from the or-so-they-say dept.

An anonymous reader writes "There has been some speculation about it. Not anymore: 'This is Apple's next iPhone. It was found lost in a bar in Redwood City, camouflaged to look like an iPhone 3GS. We got it. We disassembled it. It's the real thing, and here are all the details.' Judging by Gizmodo's reaction, it looks like a winner."

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This Is Apple's Next iPhone

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FAIL! (Score:5, Funny)

by alexandre ( 53 ) * writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:15AM (#31896508) Homepage Journal

So they actually got it connected with a SIM card or WiFi before trying it and filming the result and that's how it got remotely killed by big brother?
Major FAIL !

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Left at a bar in Redwood? (Score:2, Funny)

by Orga ( 1720130 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:24AM (#31896630)

Obviously it's infected with some virus.

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Re:Gizmodo, yeah, right (Score:5, Funny)

by Bigjeff5 ( 1143585 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:28AM (#31896686)

Yeah, but have you seen Jobs's lunch kit? OMG I want one! ;)

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Re:Gizmodo, yeah, right (Score:5, Funny)

by fortapocalypse ( 1231686 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:28AM (#31896690)

This Lunchable has real ham in it, not the processed kind offered by Microsoft.

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Re:Still too big (Score:5, Funny)

by Nethead ( 1563 ) writes: <joe@nethead.com> on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:32AM (#31896734) Homepage Journal

You insensitive clod!
Not all of us are young with good eyes and good knees.

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Re:viral marketing ploy? (Score:5, Funny)

by ajlitt ( 19055 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:34AM (#31896768)

If it turns out to run Android, then they'd go "tada! we secretly switched your Objective-C with Java."

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Best feature (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:42AM (#31896876)

The best feature from the article

...it feels even nicer in your pants.

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What a dealbreaker! (Score:2, Funny)

by broknstrngz ( 1616893 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:47AM (#31896938)

3 grams heavier
That's it, I'm not buying it. My manpurse is already getting heavy.

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I .. (Score:5, Funny)

by Ignatius ( 6850 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:56AM (#31897064)

0) Fixed that for you; 1)Linux; 2)Car analogy; 3)Insensitive clod; 4)A Beowulf cluster 5)In Soviet Russia; 6)??? [citation needed]; 7)Profit!

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Re:FAIL! (Score:2, Funny)

by Ipeunipig ( 934414 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @11:56AM (#31897068)

Plus being "Found" in the city of their greatest competitor??
Maybe it was a super secret spy mission from M$ and he was so happy it was successful that he went to celebrate at the local bar before handing the 'package' over to Gates himself!!

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Re:Best feature (Score:3, Funny)

by Nerdfest ( 867930 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:03PM (#31897150)

With the level the fanboyism is getting to these days, they better start removing the moisture detectors or making them 'water'-proof.

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Re:FAIL! (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:03PM (#31897154)

Apple!
iPhone!

APPLE!
IPHONE!

APPLE!
IPHONE!

APPLE!
APPLE!
APPLE!
IPHONE!
IPHONE!
IPHONE!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!
aPple iPhone!

yay SLASTROTURFING!!!!

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From TFA (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:05PM (#31897186)

And because it's thinner, it feels even nicer in your pants.
I *know*

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Re:FAIL! (Score:4, Funny)

by slick7 ( 1703596 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:21PM (#31897482)

According to the person who found it, this iPhone was running iPhone OS 4.0 before the iPhone 4.0 announcement. The person was able to play with it and see the iPhone 4.0 features. Then, Apple remotely killed the phone before we got access to it. We were unable to restore [...]
Next time test inside a Faraday cage.....noob.

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Re:What does Jobs throw? (Score:3, Funny)

by yabos ( 719499 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:29PM (#31897610)

Vegan hotdogs?

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Flash! (Score:3, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @12:33PM (#31897672)

So the next iPhone will have a flash.
Adobe must be pleased.

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Re:FAIL! (Score:5, Funny)

by Chuck Chunder ( 21021 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @01:23PM (#31898646) Journal

Plus with as many phone cases as there are out there, the best camouflage (assuming you're trying to protect against someone noticing the iPhone UI on a non-iPhone looking body) would be a case, even if it was poorly fitting.
Like the case they talk about in the article as being camouflage perhaps?
The camouflage case
The case it came inside was a fully developed plastic case to house this phone to disguise it like a 3GS. This wasn't just a normal case; it had all the proper new holes cut out for the new switches and ports and camera holes and camera flash. But it looks like something from Belkin or Case-Mate. It's a perfect disguise.
There's even a fucking picture so you don't have to read....

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Re:Suuuure, it was "found" (Score:4, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @01:24PM (#31898672)

Wow, you are exactly the kind of person Apple loves. How can you even speak with Steve Job's cock rammed so far down your throat?

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Re:FindMyPhone Not Working? (Score:4, Funny)

by Valdrax ( 32670 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @02:30PM (#31899734)

The only other alternative is to come forward and confirm it as a real iPhone, which I can't see Apple doing.
Why not? Oh, maybe not immediately, but the statute of limitations is long enough that Apple can just wait until the final model is ready to debut and then press charges & file civil suit. It's what I'd do if someone took one of my prototypes and bragged about their theft to the entire internet.

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Re:FAIL! (Score:4, Funny)

by Kristoph ( 242780 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @02:43PM (#31899908)

It all sounds like a bad d&d plot device ...
- you and your party are sitting in a bar
- suddenly you kick something with your foot
- it looks like last years artifact of awesomeness
- BUT NO, ITS BRAND NEW ARTIFACT OF AWESOMNESS! ZOMG! WHAT DO YOU DO?!?

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Re:Suuuure, it was "found" (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @03:03PM (#31900320)

I bet you wish Steve Jobs was harder next time.

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Re:FAIL! (Score:3, Funny)

by edmicman ( 830206 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @03:37PM (#31900924) Homepage Journal

Haha we've got one at work for I'm sure less than that...it's called "the building". None of the guys with iPhones/ATT coverage get any signal at all within our office.

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*ROFL* from the article (Score:3, Funny)

by Zarf ( 5735 ) writes: on Monday April 19, 2010 @03:39PM (#31900954) Journal

"it feels even nicer in your pants"
*LOL* ... that's in the article.

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