Gates and Jobs to Share A Stage 210
Rob wrote with a link to a Computer Business Review online article, which reports that Microsoft chairman Bill Gates and Apple chief Steve Jobs will make a joint
appearance at a future technologies conference in Carlsbad, California. The event is expected to last a little more than an hour, and the two computer industry magnates are expected to reflect on their pasts - while theorizing on the future. "[WSJ Tech columnist] Walt Mossberg, a co-producer of the conference who will interview the execs on-stage along with colleague Kara Swisher, said they simply invited Gates and Jobs to do the interview ... [Mossberg] declined to give any color about the questions he and Swisher are preparing, or any additional information. Most likely, Gates and Jobs will use the occasion to do some friendly sparring on their polar-opposite philosophies on personal computing. Jobs may bang on about the benefits of a software-hardware approach, while Gates may rattle off the joys of partnering with hardware partners."
heroes (Score:5, Funny)
While drinking water.... (Score:5, Funny)
Ob (Score:2, Funny)
It's a special event. (Score:4, Funny)
Re:where's Linus? (Score:3, Funny)
That, and it'll be the only way to get any noise up there that isn't marketing rhetoric.
Open letter (Score:5, Funny)
Please could you ask Bill to bring along 235 software patents or shut up.
Sincerely, everybody.
Re:heroes (OT) (Score:3, Funny)
This Kiss (Score:1, Funny)
Re:while I wouldn't call it a confrontation of... (Score:5, Funny)
Mac = Neutral Evil (we're evil, if we break the law our lawyers will get us out)
M$ = 20th level necromancer
special attack = Summon Zombie pc
Mac = 20th level enchanter
special attack = Charm people into thinking a Mac will make them cool
two things i want to see: (Score:5, Funny)
2. an icon for jobs on slashdot. gates has his borg visor one. why not jobs with an ipod?
Re:Perfect timing! (Score:3, Funny)
I wager 30 quatloos on the newcomer.
Why'd I think... (Score:4, Funny)
"their polar-opposite philosophies"? (Score:5, Funny)
Jobs: We want you to be locked in to proprietary Apple products
Would that be east-west poles, 'cause they seem pretty close together...
2 CEOs enter... (Score:5, Funny)
One CEO leaves.
Oblig. (Score:5, Funny)
Billg: Sharing a stage with Steve Jobs? That's the dumbest fucking idea I've heard since I've been at Microsoft.
Re:heroes (OT) (Score:5, Funny)
Jobs: I'm a Mac
Gates:
It'll be like this: (Score:2, Funny)
Re:heroes (Score:0, Funny)
Thank goodness it wasn't Ballmer (Score:5, Funny)
Is it safe? (Score:4, Funny)
Left out... (Score:2, Funny)
Mac and PC (Score:1, Funny)
I hope Jobs introduces himself as Mac and Gates introduces himself as PC.
"Hi, I'm Mac.. and I'm PC"
That would be great!
Jared F
You know... (Score:3, Funny)
After all, who else besides them have duped and lied more than them? (outside of politics, of course)
The difference between Gates and Jobs is only this: Gates TELLS you he is fucking you in the ass, whereas Jobs just hopes you won't notice.
Re:It'll be like this: (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Not what they say... (Score:3, Funny)
Jobs does not hinder reality.
He merely... distorts it.
Re:while I wouldn't call it a confrontation of... (Score:3, Funny)
M$: Trying to summon a lawyer.
GM: 1d20+43 = 63, you summoned bloodsucker bastard lawyer from ninth circle of hell. Your turn, Apple.
Apple: Trying to cast "Control minds of iPod users with vision of drm-free music"
GM: 1d20+16 = 17, forty thousand iPod users are under your command, Steve. M$?
M$: We try to sue Linux users for using software infrigning our patents.
GM: 1d20 - 16 = -4, and you do not own any useful patents. Apple?
Apple: We tell our customers that higher bitrate is worthy 30c.
GM: 1d20+27 = 41, forty one thousand users now believe you. Minus the forty thousands that were hypnotised, they've lost their mind and thus cannot reason.
Some Random Geek: But where are the Linux users?
Some Random Computer User: WTF is Linux?
GM: Some Random Computer User does not know Linux. Sorry, Some Random Geek.
Some Random Geek: But there is Ubuntu...
Dell:
Some Random Crapware Company:
Another Random Geek: It was supposed to be a fight between M$ and Apple.
Some Random Geek: Mod parent +5 insightful!
Another Random Crapware Company: This is not crap!
Dell: Let's have a deal with M$...
M$: OK, like the one with Novell?
Novell: We only want SuSE to be more compatible with M$!
Another Random Geek: You betrayed us, Novell!
Some Random Geek: Mod parent +5 insightful!
Some random
Apple: Leopard will be delayed.
Another Random Geek: Damn it! I knew that Apple is going to forget about Macs when it dropped "Computers" from its name...
Some Random Geek: Mod parent +5 insightful!
Another Random Geek: Mod parent -1 redundant...
GM: SHUT UP EVERYONE! Time's out, it's been an hour.
Re:where's Linus? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Not Stallman - Shuttleworth! (Score:3, Funny)
A complete set (Score:3, Funny)
Re:where's Linus? (Score:3, Funny)
Or both gates and jobs, with his fearsome lack of personal hygiene...
Re:heroes (OT) (Score:2, Funny)
Jobs: I'm a Mac
Gates:
Gates: Hello, I'm a Wii
Jobs:
Re:heroes (OT) (Score:3, Funny)
What about security? (Score:3, Funny)
The Apple attendees will walk in casually in their tie dye shirts and Birkenstocks, sit down and wait for the movie... er event to start with a glaze in their eyes and a half smile on their lips. Their wallets and ID will be safe and no one will get sick. They paid twice as much to attend, but no one will complain.
The Microsoft attendees will each be stopped at the door and asked "You are entering the auditorium. Accept or cancel?" When they go to sit down they'll discover their wallet is gone. Every fifth person will have a cold or some sort of virus so by the time the event is over, all the attendees will leave sick. They'll sit expectantly waiting for something to happen, but each time Bill walks out onto the stage he stumbles, falls and has to restart his entrance. Once he does get going all he'll talk about is how beautiful the backdrop is.
I personally think it would be rather humorous that they each give a presentation created and shown on their respective systems. We know Bill has been embarrassed by crashes a few times. Think he'll use Vista or XP?