Ars Technica's iPod nano Dissection 532
starwindsurfer wrote to mention an Ars Technica review of the iPod nano in which they autopsy the cute little guy to find out what makes him tick. A more thorough review than the one we ran last week. From the article: "At this point we were astounded that the iPod nano was still working properly, albeit with a broken display. Because we had honestly expected the iPod nano to break by this time, we were forced to depart from our planned schedule of destruction and try and run over it with the car. Surely, we thought, it could never withstand the crushing power of German automotive engineering." Update: 09/12 14:58 GMT by Z : Changed linking words to previous article for clarity. Monday fuzziness.
So does nano... (Score:5, Funny)
Geeks are like apes (Score:5, Funny)
Give somehting new and unknown to a bunch of apes and the first thing they do is smash it or rip it apart inquisitively.
Guess we ain't so superior after all.
Dead Cat (Score:5, Funny)
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
Small, rugged, scratchproof: pick any two?
Tell you what: if you buy an itty-bitty iPod nano and still think it's too bulky after adding a sleeve around it, I will personally come to your house and sew bigger pockets onto all your clothes.
Zonk's article linking... (Score:4, Funny)
Funny this should come up... (Score:5, Funny)
I tried to convince him that he would break it via collision with rocks or maybe a tree. He claimed that it was a very durable piece of hardware.
To demonstrate, he dropped it to the carpeted floor and bopped it with his foot...
The display shattered.
I think I laughed for a good half-hour. I felt bad about it, but there's nothing you can do but laugh when something so perfectly comedically timed happens.
It wasn't all bad. He just used this as an excuse to buy the new Nano.
Re:Geeks are like apes (Score:5, Funny)
Forget the Nano ! (Score:5, Funny)
Will you please please run a review on my Mother-In-Law ??? Gratitudes in advance.
Re:Geeks are like apes (Score:5, Funny)
Guess we ain't so superior after all.
But now we can also run things over with cars...so clearly we've evolved. No more pounding on it with large rocks.
Re:So does nano... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
I added the sleeve and it's still too bulky. I'll be expecting you at my house at 8am sharp tomorrow.
Nerds (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Inquisitiveness Gooooood (Score:5, Funny)
Man, we sure have come a long way!
Re:How to Kil^H^H^H turn a Nano into a Shuffle... (Score:2, Funny)
So basically, VW + Nano = Shuffle?
Re:Geeks are like apes (Score:5, Funny)
Re:iPod Nano (Score:2, Funny)
even if you keep it in a sock you still get those little scartches
Not to mention a somewhat cheesy music collection.
Re:Dead Cat (Score:1, Funny)
Why not replace the toast with _another_ cat strapped back to back with the first? They seem to enter chaotic oscillation without actually needing to be dropped from a building. Actually the cat(s) shouldn't be dead unless you building a Schrodinger quantum antigravity device. By extention two pieces of buttered toast should have the same properties, but the cat device is 9 times more robust. A silmilar effect can be achieved using only one cat of the surface it stands on is heated. Because any such anti-grav device has rotational stability issues a box must be constructed around the cats for a practical device. Airholes for the cats to breathe allow photons into and out of the box causing each of the cats to become 50% dead when observed and the antigrav device falls to the ground. Once I find the right permeable opaque material and some more cats it's space here I come.
Re:Summary (Score:5, Funny)
What kind of complaint is this?
"I can't believe how small this thing that's supposed to be small is. Can you believe they actually made this small thing so small?"
Next you'll be comlpaining about Ferraris
"I can't believe how fast this thing is. Why would they want to make a car that's supposed to be fast this fast? Stupid Ferrari..."
Re:Dead Cat (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Funny this should come up... (Score:3, Funny)
I love when people do dumb shit. Nothing is funnier.
I once watched a guy claim his new 4WD Subaru could climb up a huge dirt pile. So he did it to prove it, problem was once on the crest of a pile of soft dirt your tires sink in and your screwed. He had to pay the people who had the dirt pile to dig out dirt around it slowly so it eventually could be driven out.
I also watched a guy at an airport with one of those Panasonic Toughbooks stand on top of it (while closed) to impress a woman at the airport bar (way to get chicks) and then he opened the display and turned it on to reveal a nicely mangled LCD panel. Even the bartender laughed his ass off.
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
Hell, I discovered with my calphalon cookware that if you hard annodize aluminum, and then stir-fry zucchini in it, you'll end up with an indestructable and permanent coating that could protect space shuttles during re-entry. Who the F*CK thought non-nonstick cookware was a good idea ????
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
* I high-school intern we had last summer wrapped his 20GB iPod in plastic wrap. When I asked him why, he said, "Because I'm Chinese. We wrap everything in plastic wrap. You should see the remote controls..." Flabergasted, I looked over at another intern, also Chinese, who was nodding in agreement. I thought nothing of it, ok that's a lie, until I went into the local Chinese take-out place the other day and saw their cash register wrapped in Saran-wrap.
Re:What apple should do now (Score:4, Funny)
---
gyram gritru bocnor rofa
Re:Bad Selection of stress tests (Score:3, Funny)
Not with the iPod Nano, presumably.
"Is that an iPod Nano in your pocket, or do you just have a small penis?"
Re:Funny this should come up... (Score:2, Funny)
The display shattered.
I was at an Apple Executive Briefing a few years ago when the white iBook was brand new. One of the employees was using one to take notes. The Apple exec giving the presentation wanted to show how sturdy it was, so he took the iBook and dropped it on the floor, and the screen cracked. It was still working fine (this was to demonstrate that the little rubber bumpers that held the HD in place were good at shock absorption, and they were), but it was a bit hard to use with a big crack down the middle. The best part? It was the employees personal laptop, not a company one. Needless to say, it was taken away to get a new screen on the spot. The executive was quite embarrassed.
Re:What apple should do now (Score:2, Funny)
Nano -vs- iPad (Score:1, Funny)
From TFA:
Wasn't this solved last April with the Apple iPad [boakes.org]?
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
Little wonder that China has such a large population.
Re:Dead Cat (Score:2, Funny)
John
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
You Chinese too?
Re:What apple should do now (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Funny this should come up... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:What apple should do now (Score:1, Funny)
Lacking a really high place to drop the nano from, we decided the throw the nano as high as we could, say 40 feet into the air, and let it land--hard--on the concrete.
Considering how geeky the guys at Ars Technica are, I was surprised they got it more than 5 feet in the air...
Re:Bad Selection of stress tests (Score:3, Funny)
Yes, I can see why Levi Strauss had the name of the small pocket changed. Imagine a 19th century TV ad for Levi's:
In the foreground an old man, played by Mel Brooks, is holding a pair of jeans.
"...and this small pocket here is great for holding matc..."
In the background, a miner is entering a coal mine. He has an unlighted cigarette in his mouth and is patting his pockets for matches. He enters the coal mine as his right hand finds the small pocket.
***BOOM***
Camera turns back to the salesman:
"...coins! This small pocket is great for holding coins!"
Re:What apple should do now (Score:5, Funny)
Plastic wrap (Score:5, Funny)
I once knew a guy (who is Korean) who wrapped his remotes in plastic wrap. I thoughtfully took out the batteries and similarly protected them (being careful to cover the terminals too
I wish I could have seen his face when he found it. (He probably didn't think it was funny.)
Charles? Are you reading this? It was me -- I did it.
Back on topic -- The one thing I don't like about my ipod is its propensity to collect scratches. Could they not have used a more scratch resisant material? I guess not.
Re:Geeks are like apes (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Bad Selection of stress tests (Score:3, Funny)
Hopefully, for your sake, it's an iPod.
[Notice Apple's comparison of Nano to a pencil... [apple.com]]
Car alarm test. (Score:3, Funny)
My iPod is so small... (Score:1, Funny)
Technocrat #2: MY iPod is so small it fits in a single cell IN MY BRAIN.
Technocrat #3: *My* iPod is so small that it actually uses coding added to my own DNA, letting me use all my cells for storage!
Technocrat #4: (Wearing huge black gloves connected to a metal backpack) *My* iPod has negative mass. It requires a magnetic containment field to hold.
Re:What apple should do now (Score:1, Funny)
However, the calluses on their hands can have the same effect...
Re:What apple should do now (Score:2, Funny)