A Six-Step Plan for Apple 773
An anonymous reader writes "Open letter from Alex Salkever to Jobs. One thing in particular strikes me: 'The latest round of attacks on Microsoft software is terrifying. If using a Mac means servers in Russia are less likely to harvest my passwords and offer my identity to the highest bidder, I think that's an offer I'd like to hear more about.' I think he's got something there."
Finally! Step 2 (Score:5, Funny)
servers in Russia are less likely to harvest my passwords and offer my identity to the highest bidder
Step 1: Create Server (in Soviet Russia no less!) that harvests passwords
Step 2: Offer harvested information to highest bidder
Step 3: Profit!
Now, to create these password harvesting servers... off I go! Oh wait, he said something about a six step plan! Damn't!
Re:Yes, but... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:4, Funny)
No worries mate!
Step 1: Create password harvesting server.
Step 2: Offer harvested information to highest bidder
Steps 3-5: ???
Step 6: Profit!
Re:Let's not forget... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:No Contest (Score:3, Funny)
Vaporware isn't usable. Perhaps I should look for a leaked copy of SP2 on my favorite p2p system?
As a self-appointed representative of ... (Score:5, Funny)
Are we phishing for passwords? Yes. Are we preying on the gullibility of millions of computer users? Yes. Are we using the information that we're receiving to access as much cash/credit from the end-users as is possible, probably ruinging their credit and their lives? Yes.
But we're doing it all to fight terrorism. Didn't anybody watch our recruitment movie, Swordfish [imdb.com]? We're the good guys. Now give us your passwords and leave us to fight the good fight.
Perpetual Marketshare? (Score:5, Funny)
This leads to the conclusion that Apple must have invented purpetual self sustaining marketshare, a graph of which could make MC Escher proud, and that they must patent this immediately so that they can increase their marketshare to -pi
Re:As a self-appointed representative of ... (Score:5, Funny)
Are we phishing for passwords? Yes. Are we preying on the gullibility of millions of computer users? Yes. Are we using the information that we're receiving to access as much cash/credit from the end-users as is possible, probably ruinging their credit and their lives? Yes.
There it is.
No money means you don't go out.
Not going out means you don't meet any people.
Not meeting any people means you don't meet people of the opposite sex.
Not meeting people of the opposite sex means you don't breed.
Ergo, these people are thinning the herd, darwinistically removing the gullible people who stupidly let terrorists into our fair lands.
Let them be, says I.
Soko
Re:Let's not forget... (Score:2, Funny)
They have the same advantage over pc's that firefox has over IE, mostly that they dont have much of a market share, so hackers dont spend that much time making viruses for them. As long as they stay relatively unused by the mass public, it will stay that way. If everyone gets the same idea to move to a mac, virus wirters will shift their attention to macs.
No, it's because of Aqua, which dilutes pathogens. The bigger marketshare Apple gets, the more Aqua there is, and obviously this means there will be less virus problems.
Re:As if.... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Let's not forget... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Err... (Score:2, Funny)
Only a complete idiot would take advantage of that offer.
Well, it DID say they were using a PC... ;-)
Re:apple? (Score:5, Funny)
Disclaimer: Move along. This is a joke, girlfriend.
free screensavers???!! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:3, Funny)
No, silly; he's a dancer!
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:3, Funny)
Shouldn't that be a Beowulf cluster of computers in Soviet Russia?
(Cue the hot grits, you insensitive clod!)
Re:Err... (Score:3, Funny)
Right here. [ebay.com]
(see, I can *almost* be funny...)
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:3, Funny)
... that creates you.
Sure (Score:3, Funny)
I need your root password and IP address for it to install correctly.
Re:Sure (Score:4, Funny)
Sure, my password is, oddly enough, your birthday and my ip is 127.0.0.1
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:2, Funny)
Re:"Apple Computer": A Ridiculous Liberal Myth (Score:1, Funny)
bah.
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:1, Funny)
* You got first post.
* You used a "three-step" post.
* You worked in a "in Soviet Russia."
-AND-
* You got modded up to 5.
I'm going to start a Scrictnein Fan Club.
Re:I like Apple the way they are. (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Finally! Step 2 (Score:3, Funny)
Well at least spell my name right if you do